Home > My Rhymes > I’m Thinking of Starting a Diet

I’m Thinking of Starting a Diet

I’m thinking of starting a diet

In fact I might start it today

The goal of my diet is simple

To make fifty pounds go away


My shirt creeps up over my belly

My pants are two inches too tight

I’m a pastry away from exploding

Good gosh, I’m a horrible sight


I can’t see my toes when I’m standing

My belt buckle points at the floor

I suck in my gut and turn sideways

To maneuver my butt through a door


Oh, once I was young and athletic

And once I was nimble and lean

But I said “super size it” too often

I think y’all know what I mean


They say diet is all about willpower

And not for the lazy or meek

I’m thinking of starting a diet

Well, maybe I’ll start it next week.

Linked to The Purple Tree House and Poets United

  1. April 8, 2012 at 1:28 PM

    diet isn’t just about willpower, it’s about knowing that certain foods are poisons to your system and adversely affect your health, not just weight, not just heart, but diabetes, and vision and sex life and coordination and thinking, even personality

    stripper limerick

  2. iwasaplatypus
    April 9, 2012 at 3:02 AM

    So true and so funny at the same time!! Love it!!

  3. April 10, 2012 at 6:48 AM

    This is so good! Every rhyme flows off the tongue, good luck with taking your resolutions off the page and into life!

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