Archive

Posts Tagged ‘humorous’

Just Add Water

April 29, 2012 12 comments

This post is linked to The Mag prompt #115 which is the image above

 

 

She bought him in a pet shop for a dollar and a quarter

The lady at the counter said “It says here just add water

Then fertilize and nurture him and grow your perfect man

But it comes with this disclaimer: Most aren’t worth a damn”

Performance Anxiety

April 22, 2012 19 comments

 

This post is linked to The Mag prompt #114 which is the image above.

 

What joy! At Last! An honorarium!

To read my verse at the aquarium

What angst! What pain! My poems stank!

The performance ended in the tank.

 

 

Eggsistentialism

April 9, 2012 13 comments

This post is linked to The Mag prompt 112 which is the image above.

 

 

Existential image

Floating eggshell girl

Drifting ‘cross the desert

Clouds a gothic whirl

 

Meaning is elusive

Imagery’s obscure

Artist has a message

What, I can’t be sure

A Good Plan Gone Bad

April 4, 2011 27 comments

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This is a response to Magpie Tales prompt # 60 which is the image above.

 

Water, water everywhere

And I have hit the skids

My wife is at the day spa

And I’m stuck with the kids


At the time I purchased it

It seemed a clever plan

Harmless little birthday gift

I bought for Mary Ann


I almost had forgotten

(You guys know how that goes)

And when it finally hit me

My poor heart nearly froze


Thank the lord for Mastercard

And thanks for iPads too

All I did was point and click

And bid my cares adieu


Ah, but all the best laid plans

Like mine have gone astray

Raining cats and dogs out there

Kids can’t go out and play


They are into every thing

The house… an awful mess

Noise is just unbearable

And I am in distress


Please come home my Mary Ann

My head’s about to blow

Is it like this every day?

My god, I didn’t know!



Dangerous Ducks

March 1, 2011 19 comments
I wonder where the ducks go
When the sun goes down at night
Its quack and waddle all day long
While plainly in our sight

 

They paddle gaily ’round the pond
While always in our view
As if they need an alibi
For what they plan to do

 

But when it’s dark they disappear
And who knows where they go
I’m sure they must be somewhere
Ah, but where I’d like to know

 

We know that rabbits burrow
And the wrens head to their nest
But where the ducks go still remains
A mystery at best

 

Do they check into a cheap motel
And play the TV loud?
Or put on leather jackets
And run with a rowdy crowd?

 

Do they smoke and drink and party
And hang in sleazy bars?
Or terrorize their neighbors
Stealing hubcaps off of cars?

 

Go on and laugh, if you see fit
That’s certainly your right
It is, that is, if you know where
The ducks go every night!

This poem is linked to One Shot Wednesday at One Stop Poetry and Jingle Poetry and Purple Tree House

The Hoary Marmot

February 25, 2011 14 comments

 

 

 

 

 

This verse is linked to Poets United.  Here’s a verse for a poor little guy who ordinarily gets no love.

 

In the Rocky Mountains high
Where icy peaks impale the sky
Lives a timid little varmint
Known only as the Hoary Marmot*

Like a squirrel, but round and furry
Always in a dreadful hurry
A nibble here, then dart for cover
Danger from above can hover

Up there where the air is thinner
He’s the Eagle’s favorite dinner
Beak and talon aim to harm it
Life’s a bitch for the Hoary Marmot

 

 

 

*Largest of the North American ground squirrels…you’re welcome!

War of Words

February 22, 2011 16 comments

Sometimes, it’s hard to keep the peace among the elements in a line.

My verb and object disagreed
It was a heated fight
I tried my best to mediate
But couldn’t make it right

The harshest struggles in a line
Are often intramural
The verb, you see, was singular
The object being plural

And so I sought an adjective
To help diffuse the fray
“I modify, not mollify”
Was all it had to say


This poem linked to Poets United.