Raven Redux

Recycled for Halloween 2012

 

One of my all-time favorite poems is Poe’s The Raven, but let’s face it, at 1086 words it is way too long.  In today’s frenetic world, who has the time to read such things. So, in the interest of making it more accessible to the schedule-impaired, and with all due respect to the original, I have undertaken a slight edit.  Here is my 68 word version of the classic.

 

Lonely dude about to snore

Hears a knock upon his door

What is there? A talking bird!

All it knows is one damn word

Conversation is a bore

All it says is “nevermore”

Asks about his long lost flame

Lenore, the lovely lady’s name

Bird provides no help at all

“Nevermore,” it’s single call

Lonely dude goes raving mad

Bird just sits there.  Bird is bad

Linked to One Shot Wednesday.

Ahab’s Folly

 

 

Herman Melville’s classic, Moby Dick is a whopping 212,758 words.  My Plotsicle version is 173 words.  You can view other Plotsicles by clicking on the link to the right.  This is linked to One Stop Poetry.

 

 

Unsuspecting Ishmael

Decides to go a-sailing

He signs aboard the Pequod

For purposes of whaling

 

The crew’s a tad bit quirky

The ship’s master’s off his game

His peg leg is of whale bone

Captain Ahab is his name

 

Harpooner is a strange one

With tattoos from head to toe

Queequeg is the fellow’s name

That is all you want to know

 

Psychotic Captain Ahab

Is a raving, vengeful prick

Ever since he lost his leg

To the white whale, Moby Dick

 

Swears that he will sail the world

(He’s certainly no lubber)

To hunt, then kill the giant load

Of pigment-challenged blubber

 

But Moby turns the tables

When he rams and sinks the boat

Then drags old Ahab under

As they say, that’s all she wrote

 

Ship and crew are lost at sea

So much for hopes and wishes

If your name’s not Ishmael

You’re sleeping with the fishes

 

So, why did Melville spare him

From the dreadful monster whale?

Because a guy was needed

To survive and tell the tale

x

Two Kids From Verona

The original Romeo & Juliet is 25,948 words….good stuff, but does it really need to be that long?  Here’s my 141 word, Plotsicle version that hits the high points.  Linked to One Stop Poetry and Big Tent Poetry.

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Poor Romeo and Juliet

A Montague and Capulet

Their families in an awful feud

Veronan twits with attitude

Two teeny-boppers fall in love

But fate about to give a shove

On balcony defies her pa

“Where for art thou,”… blah, blah, blah

Married by a cunning friar

Jules and padre co-conspire

But, there’s a little problem, man

See, Romeo’s not told the plan

So, when young Julie fakes her death

Beau, Romeo can’t catch his breath

He drinks some poison at her side

Then exits center stage by bride

When Julie wakes to see him die

She knows she must do more than cry

Our girl’s plan has got some swagger:

Locate chest and insert dagger

A tragic tale of plans askew

The moral here is nothing new

Love can be so iridescent

But a mess when prepubescent

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Trouble In Camelot

T.H. White’s classic, The Once and Future King, is a retelling of the Arthurian legend.  It is 64,183 words long.  Here’s my attempt to tell the same story in rhyme with 225 words.  I may have left out a few details.

 

Young Arthur, who pulls sword from stone

Is destined then to hold the throne

Gets seduced by his half-sister

Bears a child, a twisted mister

Ascends the throne and picks a spot

To build idyllic Camelot

Where the rule is: Do what’s right

To quest is better than to fight

To aid him in this noble dream

Pure Art must build a righteous team

His knights, the finest of the lot

The first among them, Lancelot

But shame on young, disloyal Lance

He cannot keep it in his pants

Alas, Art’s wife’s no gem I fear

The Lance-a-lusting Guinevere

Oh, our boy, Lance is quite the swain

He’s also doing young Elaine

They have a kid, but that’s not bad

It’s fair and perfect Galahad

Adding luster to the fable

Art says they must have a table

To keep their hearts so just, so true

Well, only one that’s round will do

Then there’s Merlin, clever wizard

Victim of his trouser lizard

He gets seduced and locked away

By sexy, sultry Nimue

That’s quite shame for all concerned

Without his help, poor Art gets burned

When Mordred, Arthur’s nephew-son

Rat’s out young Lance…all comes undone

It’s hard to live life pure and true

When you don’t know who’s doing who

The dream of Camelot was gone

Just too much lancing going on

This post is linked to One Stop Poetry and Big Tent Poetry